When I began to emerge from my first unemployment-induced hermit state, a wise man counseled me.
“You aren’t going to find a job, Martha. By the sound of what you want to do and who you are, I believe you will have to make one.”
So far, he was right. This time I don’t have the formula down just yet, but it’s coming…
The first time around, I took a year off and lived large on my severance from SeaChange. My bucket list wasn’t financially frugal and I wasn’t used to living beneath the poverty level. Lessons learned:
- You don’t need stuff to be happy
- You do need to wake up refreshed rather than stiff and anxious – every day, not just weekends.
- Do what you love whatever the price because life is too short to expect a better time to do it.
The wise man also gave me names. He said talk to other people who are doing what they love and stay away from settling for tedium. I called local authors, weaseled my way into convincing the book store to let me hold a Holiday Book Fair. A ‘meet the authors and stock up for gifts’ affaire that was surprisingly well attended and successful.
That was fun. That was invigorating. That didn’t earn me a dime. I woke up refreshed for days. It also lead to managing the oil & vinegar store which was a dream job for anyone interested in food.
This time around, I have split my time in many directions. Finances are easier as I have learned to appreciate and enjoy living more frugally. I feel pregnant and ripe with possibilities and options. But six months into the nine of normal gestation, that feeling that life will never be the same again begins to take hold. There are little moments of fear and trepidation. The anecdote to that fear is belief in the patterns that changes brings.
I stretch my tentacles in many directions, not worrying about what the financial compensation will be and test the waters. The next perfect combination of learning to adapt and evolve is there if I can imagine it.
Therapeutic Misadventures 
An uncertain future is always a challenge to face on a daily basis. It can be hard to think about tomorrow when you are worried about today. You have always landed on your feet and you will again.
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Thank you dear friend for your emotional support. This is always fascinating in retrospect and painful when living through it.
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I empathise with you so much.Suddenly it is like leaving school again…what do I want to do? With new horizons? But this time there is some experience – wisdom?! – with it. Eg I can no longer wear and run in high heels, but I can still pack a punch when I want to, wipe up any messes with the t-shirt and surprise the youngsters at their own game. Actually having the youngsters around is a good tentacle…I had a library tentacle – very varied and using all my skills from the job centre and teaching – but not enough hours with the last four years of a mortgage to pay- so onward, honing other skills as we go. And you do have an election to look forward to 😉 I shall now run away quickly, in my trainers….
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You are a funny lady, Cheryl. Thanks. As to the election? Dreading it!!
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Taking that next step is always a bit shaky. Best of luck with the walk… Susan
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Good luck on your quest. My wife and I are doing something similar. If you’re old it is especially difficult but we still have hopes and dreams.
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Martha, I just love the way you think – practical and optimistic. I can’t imagine a better combination of attitudes to carry you on to this next adventure. Over the years I’ve found myself out of work many times as circumstances moved us to new countries. Each time it required reinvention – of myself and my career. You are so smart to have embraced frugal living, and I’m confident that something enticing will present itself soon. 🙂 All the best, Terri
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Thank you Terri, kind words from someone I deeply respect. I am moving past the ‘oh shit!’ stage and finding lots to be thankful for.
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“The anecdote to that fear is belief in the patterns that changes brings.” This is real wisdom.
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Thank you Phil. It comes with age, no?
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It sounds like you are heading in the same direction as me, sort of. I’m trying to make my own employment on my own terms. It’s slow going and time consuming but I’m hoping it’s going to work out ok. Hopefully it will work out ok for you too.
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Ah the time of personal reinvention is never easy but so worthwhile, Marie! So nice to hear of a fellow traveler. I always thought it would be wonderful if you could be paid for your ‘history walks and tours’ my friend! Or, you could contract out to fix the messes people find themselves in. 😉
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Both sound like fun to me. What I’m actually doing is making jewellery to sell. My nephew has a business selling VW accoutrements and he’s been selling little key rings for me. They’re hung with flowers and butterflies. Slow going so far but he’s convinced they will go down a storm and I like making them. We shall see.
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Creative outlets are an emotional boost as we struggle to find our next ‘job’. Here’s to your endeavors!!
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I wish I could be as brave as you are. My moments of fear are a bit more prolonged…
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I wouldn’t say I’m ‘brave’ but I have learned to let go of what I can not control…
Thanks for stopping by with a comment!
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Beautiful post! In past months, I have been having a similar experience. I feel you!
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Welcome Yuliya and thank you! I will have to pop over and see what you are up to. The fun of writing about your feelings/life is there is usually someone out there in the blogisphere who is experiencing similar events.
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