Introspection vs. Retrospection

I’ve moved into an antique brick schoolhouse. It’s roughly 200 years old which means it has more soul than anywhere I’ve ever lived.

The funny thing about moving is the choice of recreating or reinventing your life-style. All the stuff of daily life that you packed up and brought to this new stage is symbolic of other theaters you’ve perform in. I find this object particularly metaphorical. It is a cloisonné bowl of unknown origins that I have never been particularly fond of. It is filled with money; coins and bills from around the world left behind in wallets and jars when I returned and had no use for it. Lesson to learn? Money doesn’t buy you happiness.

The irony of either introspection or retrospection, is you can only examine that which exists; you own memories, thoughts and actions. Age provides a much wider canvas for this exercise.

Can a Schoolhouse curate memories of its own? Does it have a secret soul that holds all the lives that passed through it? I have yet to make an appointment at the Historical Society to research this little gem but I can vouch for the presence of child-like joy at the wonder of learning that occurred here. Though we had an unusual amount of critter activity this fall, I haven’t trapped a mouse in weeks. Those shadows that flit just beyond my focus are definitely not rodents. Additionally, they display an interesting array of colors. I have seen fiery red shadows, calm green mists and sunny yellow beams ducking past my peripheral vision.

I’m not losing my mind or crossing over to the side of spiritualism and hauntings. This is not a presence so much as small clouds of energy left by those who passed through. It’s more along the lines of a scent that seductively grabs you attention for a second, then is gone.

Minor changes have been made over the years. A Great Room has been added along with an entry. I wander through the rooms and imagine where the chalkboard was and rows of desks facing the teacher. Its identity is no longer a place of higher learning but it has maintained its personality, leading me to believe that everything can weather change with a solid foundation.