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This month marked my ninth month of separation from the corporate world and the life it entailed.  I had made a mental note and later a note on my calendar, that this would be the month of my total, meteoric meltdown.  Sounds strange to think I was actually planning a mental explosion so far in advance but I looked at it this way; nine months is what it takes to birth a human.  I figured I would be out of money, cut off from unemployment, in the throes of publishing, and out of options. I was giving birth to the new me that was learning to cope and reinvent.

For the most part, the above has not happened.  Unemployment has graciously extended my benefits, I’m in love with the “almost” finished product of my novel and my options just seem to continue to expand.  Life is allowing me to reinvent.  When I find myself completely frustrated and scared with the schedule of this discovery, I have to remember there is no timeframe.  There is no dress rehearsal, no do-over before you do it.

A conversation with my daughter, Lex, brought this point home the other night. (Lex, if you are reading this you might want to skip ahead and avoid the repetition.) She is struggling to find a home by August first and was feeling overwhelmed.  I know this feeling and tried a little history to calm her nerves.  In the spring of 1996, we had sold our little home.  We had  six weeks to find and close on another house. A farm in New Hampshire had fallen through and all of our savings were tied up in the mess.  Jeff and I had two dogs, a cat and two daughters to shelter as well as full-time jobs.  The hunt became frantic.  Ultimately, the majestic farm in Lunenburg was our reward for all our fear and anxiety.  We just moved forward, it wasn’t fun but then life gave us a break.  You never know when the stars are going to align.

And, perhaps, the collective lessons learned have helped me not have my magical meltdown this time.  I have written many of those “lessons formed from strife” as I went along.  The first collection of those is the novel I have written.  (Shameless plug alert! Stop right here if you’ve read it already.)  I know I’ve posted the cover choices in the past and been rewarded valuable help and insights.  So I thought I would give you a peek  at the paperback cover.  Click here for the .pdf – softcoverTM

Stay calm and carry on…

Borobudur Temple

8 comments on “Martha’s Magical Meltdown…not

  1. Touring NH says:

    Great choice for the cover! Every now and then, the stars do align.

    1. Thank you, Laura. It’s exciting to see it finally come together. I am humbled by the process.

  2. Maria says:

    I think a lot of times we over stress ourselves by thinking of the potentially bad things that could happen. I’ve found in my life that the bad things I think could happen seldom do. Instead, other things — good and bad — happen. We have to take things as they come. The only way to prepare for life’s curveballs is to build a good, hard shell made up of financial resources and supportive family and friends.

    Look at the curveballs as challenges. Use your resources — a level head, good imagination, ability to think outside the box, savings, and good friends — as your bat. If that curveball flies over the plate, bat it out of the park. If, however, it never comes close to the plate, put thoughts of it behind you so you’re ready for the next pitch.

  3. Love the analogy, Maria! I try to just roll with what life gives me and have the good fortune to have been journaling for over 30 years. If I feel lost, I always go back and see where I was 5,10, 20 years ago on this very day. That always helps me put things in perspective.

    1. Maria says:

      Journaling for 30 years! Lucky you! I’ve been journaling in my blog for only 10 years and have a handful of started-but-never-continued journals from years before that. I wish I’d kept a record of more of my life. I wish I could keep up with my life now!

      Remember, we’re always doing better when we’re moving, especially if it’s forward or even sideways. It’s the status quo — like the rut my husband tried to keep me in with him — that makes for an unfulfilling life. We’re far better off when we’re moving in some direction that we decide on.

  4. Rina Macasaet says:

    From my experience….. as I too have left the corporate world after 10 comfortable and safe years… there is a life much deeper with a different kind of purpose that not many will understand. At first you may have many questions but as the journey meant for you slowly but surely begins to unravel, you are able to make sense why separation from the corporate world happened and you eventually “arrive” or “get there” wherever, whatever, however your journey is meant to take you. Bless you path with inner strength and wisdom!

    1. Thank you Rina. I think it is important to keep a record of life as it will sustain you when the path seems murky and unclear. Being able to reassure yourself that you have had these thoughts before and always got through them is a strength born of that record.

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