I want to pick up the phone and hear a voice, but I don’t want to talk to anyone. I want to reach out, but I fear a compromise to my solitude. I am lonely, but not uncomfortable about being alone. What would make this better? What is the puzzle piece I’m missing? The ‘two-armed with arrow-feet’ won’t fit in the place of a ‘doubleheader’ or the ubiquitous ‘three-header.’

There is no one on the horizon so I think back to those relationships in the rearview mirror…was it that bad? What was so irritating? No, can’t do it again. For now, there is only me because I don’t understand my need. It is not for a life partner, life is more than half over and my most enduring partner so far, has been my sanity. I don’t feel the need for a mate to produce wonderful offspring of stellar genes. Have the T-Shirt from that one. It is someone who doesn’t exist because I am able to fill most of my own needs.

Apparently, lots of people aren’t so lucky. Am I really old-school or does this concept sound like 4th grade art class with the crazy, fresh-out-of-college art teacher?

NH Chronicle featured this hot new social trend. apparently, people go somewhere to drink so they can be creative. They featured a  Paint Bar. Apparently this is a hot venue for Date Night, Couples Night, Family Night, and Children’s Parties. Bachelorette and corporate get-togethers are also welcome. Beer and wine are served along with a limited “snack-sized” menu of small bites. An artist leads you through the evening and everyone paints their interpretation of the same image. You can even choose what painting you will create ahead of time on their event’s schedule. Cue Bob Ross, the guy with the perm that used to teach painting on public TV when I was a kid.

This evening out costs between $30 and $45 dollars per “painter” for two and a half hours. If you want to drink or eat, that is extra. the venue provides unlimited art supplies along with the instruction.

I surround myself with artwork, because I can not produce such beauty myself but I have enormous appreciation for those who can. My hands and brain produce words, not images. So I thought about what creative pursuit would drive me to socialize in such a way.

I can’t sing. I watch marvelous friends do karaoke in bars and I am in awe of their talent. Yet I strive for voice. I sing only when in the company of Alice and she immediately feigns an ear infection with much shaking of her head. To pay someone to instruct me in the art of voice while I consumed wine (presumably to loosen my inhibitions) seems a waste of money. I CAN’T SING!!  But if I could, I would belt out the lyrics to Joni Mitchell’s Hejira right now.

Age is a funny thing. I find my own company pretty comfortable, even when I sing…